The best years of my life were at college. After 13 years of bullying and cliques in a small midwestern community school, my reflection of college was like heaven. I was finally able to live life without being harrassed daily and I could surround myself with people who were similar to me. It was there that I experienced epiphanies that changed my view of life.

So, it was with great shock and sadness when I heard about the shootings that occurred Tuesday at Virginia Tech. I can only pray that the survivors may find a positive epiphany out of their sorrow.

Whenever I hear of such tragedy at the hands of an armed gunman, I begin to feel defenseless and helpless. It is from such a feeling that I wonder why we are not better equipped to handle such situations in our lives. Why aren't we taught how to defend ourselves in school?

I recall hearing the news on April 20, 1999 as I imbibed some cocktails with co-workers at a restaurant in the Denver Tech Center area. I watched the TV screen at the bar with disbelief as local and national media recounted the story umpteen times about Columbine.

I then thought, what would have happened if PE classes routinely taught self-defense to all grade levels? What if all students knew how to confidently, proactively, quickly and respectfully diffuse a negative physical altercation?

It's all fine and dandy to know our readin', writin', and 'rithmetic, but how does that prepare us to live as good, responsible citizens? How can we prepare our children, our next generations, to be better citizens and be responsible and caring members of our society? How can we teach our children to face evil and subdue it?

Our first response is not the trained police or authorities in these situations, it is people like you and me. We are the first response. I'm not talking about arming teachers and professors with weapons, as I believe weapons are motivation for violence (we all go off the edge ever so often, and I can't imagine what would have happened if one of my worst teachers had ready access to a gun--doubt I would be here today). I'm talking about knowing exactly how to deal verbally to calm a potential violent situation, to infuse kind respect to everyone involved, and if there is a weapon (a fist, a knife, a gun, a kicking leg, etc.) that those involved can make quick, unnoticable motions to take over the weapon, safely secure it, and calm the perpetrator to the good of all who surround the incident.

Then, the nation was jolted by the events of September 11, 2001. I immediately thought, what would have happened if the people on those three fateful planes could have known how to properly diffused that terror situation in the air? They had the strength in numbers. But they didn't have the knowledge to intelligently overcome the terrorists and physically subdue them.

The after effect of the tramatic events of September 11th was not to equip all citizens in our nation with self-defense strategies to subdue any form of terrorism. No, it was to put guns in the cockpit. What will that accomplish? Guns, in the hands of someone preoccupied with something like flying a plane, can easily be used against them.

Now, if pilots and flight attendants knew self-defense and knew how to coordinate efforts by the passengers to maintain control of their plane at all times, then we could say we've done something to combat terrorism.

Flash forward to this week. Again, victims were held defenseless because instead of being taught how to defend themselves through 13 years of primary school, they were taught how to do the tinikle (You know, when you had to jump between the rhythm of the clapping bamboo sticks? Our PE teacher would call it double dutch with bamboo sticks.) in PE class.

What would have happened if the girl and the RA practiced self-defense against the attacker in the dorm? The worst that could have happened if they had tried to subdue the attacker with self-defense moves is exactly what happened to them that fateful Tuesday morning.

The best thing that could have happened is that they would have been able to successfully subdue the attacker before the gun was raised, or even if the gun was raised, they strategically and successfully gained control of the weapon from the attacker, were able to subdue the attacker while maintaining respect and consideration to the attacker as a fellow human, and allow him to understand that his decisions and choices to attack were not the right thing to do.

I know this is a pipe dream in a utopian world. But, just imagine... If we were all taught how to effectively think through choices and make decisions in our daily lives that would not only benefit ourselves, but also benefit all those around us? If we were taught not only self-defense, but also how to maintain positive relationships, regardless the situation?

Think about it. Imagine.

North Korea's Yummy Omelet
Watch out Denny's and Perkins, I've heard North Korea's cookin' up an omelet, and they say it's da bomb! Apparently for Condi Rice, the international language of peace is now Metaphor. The metaphor Rice referenced here is the old adage, "I don't count my chickens until they hatch." I just want to say, this is an egg I would rather see scrambled with some cheddar, onion, ham, --and no mushroom cloud!

Eggsrava-Gaza?
Not to be outdone, peace talks in the holy city of Mecca have brought the two political factions in Palestine together in governing the war ravaged area. Our good friend, King Abdullah of Saudi Arabia was the king pin instrumental in bringing Hamas and Fatahs to make amends. They have decided that the Palestinian parliament majority Hamas will have their delegate Ismail Haniyeh reappointed as prime minister, and Mahmoud Abbas, Fatah's leader, will continue to be president. For some people, they may be wondering: Will this stop the fighting in Gaza? Me? I'm wondering: Who's the head of the henhouse here? Is it the President, or the Prime Minister? Regardless who gets to be the rooster and the hen, I'm sure they'll be serving it up overeasy. Hey, where's the bacon?

Putin Eggs on the Frypan
The US and Europe are scrambling international security with their unilateral policies, according to Russian President Vladimir Putin. Mixing it up at an international security conference, Putin suggested that the US-led "unipolar world" has brought worldwide instability, insecurity, and has pushed countries to seek weapons of mass destruction. Unipolar world? Really?? Now I've heard all the hype about the polar swap in 2012, but this unipolar world intrigues me. Globally, that would really stir things up. Heck, we may not know where the compass points, but I bet I'd still like a little cheese in my scrambled eggs.

Iraq's Sunny Side Cafe
The new commander for the US Forces in Iraq is calling for 'cooperation' between American and Iraqi forces in that conflict. Gee, that sounds familiar. Hmm. Oh, yes. I remember my kindergarten teacher using that big word. Maybe our plan for peace in Iraq is this. Yes, all I really need to know I learned in kindergarten. Now there's a policy for international relations! And that's serving it sunny side up!

Tek Jansen: Egg Beater
I think we need to enlist an experienced warrior for this battle of the eggs: Tek Jansen! It seems that there's been a krono-rift in the space time continuum that has caused this outbreak of eggs-traordinary portions. Hmm... Could it be, Condi Rice is Tek Jansen's biggest fan?

Do I have egg on my face, or what?! I've heard it's great for the pores.

From my blog at indigolake.blogspot.com

"Oh, it is soo adorable! *squeee squeee* It's soo much bigger than I thought! *I know.* I could just kiss it and kiss it. Oh, *reading the card* 'I sent you this love bandit to steal your heart, because you've stolen mine. Love, Jim'* squeee squeee*" No! NO! NOOOOO! Fake O's for a stuffed teddy bear? Phuuleeeease! I am repulsed by the thought that any woman can get swept away by a teddy bear. How does a woman respond to this? "Oh, Jim, let me do your sensuous bandit teddy bear, since you apparently have no balls to steal my heart yourself!"

No Valentine bears for me!