i recently found out that i'm pregnant, i'm delighted!! So here's an update on how I'm feeling and how the baby is developing!

 

The Baby

At the moment the baby is in its 10th week of development, it is less than 2 inches long and weighs about 5 grams. The basic boby plan is laid down. Fingers and toes have separted into individual digits and the til has dissappeared! The baby has taste bud now and tooth buds have developed even though teeth don't start to grow till the the baby a a few months old! The baby's brain is growing really quicknow and almost a quarters of a million nuerons (brain cells) develop every minute.

   

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 The Mommy-To-Be (aka Me)

Lately i've been exhausted no matter how much i sleep or rest! My intire body is so itchy its maddening!!! i still haven't worked out how to relieve it! i have a little bump already , and i need to pee all the time! I haven't been sick alot so i think i'm fairly lucky most women vomit on a daily basis, i've just felt i'm gonna be sick...but i've only been sick a couple of times! I'm havinga lot of trouble eating. I'm a fussy eater normally but now somethings i used to love make me feel ill! i Can't eat alot in one go,i get full really easy. So i have to try eat several time a day instead to make sure i get enough food!

I have a strange felling that i'm having twins which would be cool!! I'd love to have two! and i think its gonna be girl.

She sits. She's sure the sound of the rain beating against the window is tremendous, but, she cannot hear it over the Evanescence music blaring through her head phones. She flips open her phone 7.23am. "Still dark" She thinks. The weather matched her mood. She becomes aware once again of that dull ache in her chest, it’s been weeks and the pain is still growing worse every day. She reaches into her backpack -she had it since 5th year, it’s beaten, battered, covered in buttons, badges and graffiti- and pulls out her dairy.

She looks around, train's still empty, won't fill up till Wicklow. She put pen to paper and writes:
"The Dark and Dirty Sky weighs heavy. Dampens my already heavy soul. I need to get out from under this darkness. How? Why does she affect me so?
GOD!! She's So Beautiful!!
Her Scent!!
Her Glow!!
Her Voice!!
Why doesn't want me?"
A tear rolls down her cheek. She brushes it away and glances out the window again.

"I hate this.
I hate that she can make feel so horrible, when I only want to love her. Thos other girls don't care..... I do! She's so fragile! And she's already broken! I can put her back together, protect her! She just doesn't see me!! Or she just doesn't want!

I can't tell her! Not now, it’s gone too far, too long. I'll freak her out, scare away!

I love her!
I just wanna hold her hold, kiss her. I’d do anything for one kiss.
Tell her it'll all ok. Just one Kiss!"

She stops writing, snaps the diary shut. Music still blaring!
"I can't take this anymore" She thinks "The pain, it’s just too much!" Rain beats the side of the train. She opens the dairy again.

"The Dirty Skye taunts me! Telling me I'll never have her, that she'll never see"

She closes the diary. Puts it back into her backpack slowly, her eyes are burning now. She flips open her phone 7.32am. She sits on the train, waits for stop. She finally gets off the train. Makes her way to the bathroom, brushes her hair, washes her face, smiles a fake, yet convincing smile at her reflection.
She makes her way to college. Her soul is now even heavier, how bad will the ache be tomorrow?

To be Understood
To be Seen
To be Touched
To be Cared for
All the little perks that come from being loved.

You learn so much about yourself when you let someone love you, and more importantly when you let yourself love someone. You can often find out things you don’t particularly like. Such as, how your moods, actions and words affect those around you, how hard it can be for people to get along with you sometimes.
You learn that the way you are used to dealing, coping with things will no longer suffice. You learn this from the way you affect the one you love. You see if you love someone and are loved in return, yours moods and emotions are reflected in one another. ~You feel how he or she feels~
With this new found awareness now know you must change. Not to be better, nor to please your partner. You must learn to be part of each other, to consider each other to ask for help, also, to recognise when help is being asked for.
Until you learn the how’s, what’s and why’s of each other love will see you through. It’s the most exhilarating, rewarding adventure you will ever take

If love was place it would be somewhere to run to, somewhere to take sanctuary. The place the place you love to get lost in. A place you can be yourself and be seen that way. A place where you are eternally beautiful. It would be a fantastical place like something right out of your wildest imagines, your favourite book, or video game.

How can you let yourself be loved?
Its difficult, but, most worthwhile things are. But it’s made easier when you find the person who has all the keys, and knows all the right buttons to press, and just walks right in. To answer the question; it’s all about fear, fear of pain and heartbreak, but, to live in fear is the worst kind of pain and loneliness. Pain fades, broken hearts heal. Live the adventure, take the risk. You may be surprised.

So go,
Learn the how’s, the what’s and the why’s
Love, Be Loved, Live, Fearlessly.


With Love,
Louise

Last night I went to a photo shoot with one of the local camera clubs... I brought my friend steph along with me.. it was soo much fun i really want to be a model now... i had been thinking about it for a while but now i'm convinced i can't wait see the pictures... i'll be posting them on my bebo page theres a link in my blog roll!!!

See ya

 

http://--tinkerbelle--.bebo.com/